Just don't forget the baby

" sometimes all you can do is not think, not wonder, not imagine, not obsess… just breathe, and have faith that everything will work out for the best . . ."

A friend posted this quote on her Facebook the other day. It keeps running through my mind. It's one of those quotes that reminds you that things happen when you stop stressing over them (like getting pregnant, taking a big test, or waiting for something in the mail).  

I know that it's in Gods hands as to when Evan will get his new liver and I truly believe he has a plan for us. I just wish I knew that plan. It is so hard not to spend every waking (and when I'm supposed to be sleeping) moment wondering when we will get "the call." Then of course I wonder where Gary will be when it happens. Will he be flying? Will I have to get the First Sergeant to have to call his aircraft back from a flight? Will it be in the middle of the night like they say it usually happens? Are our bags really packed enough? Will I forget something? 

I spoke to a new friend today who is 25 with MSUD and awaiting her call for a new liver.  As I was telling her about all my fears and wondering how I would handle things when we do get the call I realized none of that really mattered. All of those things would work out. So what if I forget a toothbrush..there are stores in California.  I finally told myself that nothing matters...JUST DON'T FORGET THE BABY! 

So back to that quote...don't think, wonder, imagine, or obsess....harder said than done! Just wish there were a switch that I could turn off and allow myself to breathe and let my faith carry us through this.  I pray each day that God gives us the strength to get through the next day, week, month, however long it may be. I pray that he keeps Evan healthy so that we don't have the added stress of him being sick or having his levels off. 

I am hoping that by writing this all out I will be able to stop thinking, wondering, imagining, and obsessing and just breath and have faith!